This evening, dear readers, it is my high privilege to be the first to interview Mr. J. Daniel, one-mile runner.
Editor: Mr. Daniel, to what do we owe this auspicious opportunity?
JD: Well, it's not THAT important...I mean, all it is is a mile run. I mean, people have done it before.
Ed: Well, point taken, but please tell us about YOUR experience this morning.
JD: Well, we went to the neighborhood of my dear friend, David Hook, a fellow Loves Park resident. He has this pond in the front of his subdivision, and we did the mile around that.
Ed: Um, so why did you do that? Run a mile around a pond, I mean...
JD: Oh, oh...well, see, every year, our School does the mile run as part of our P.E. They sort of put us up to it, you could say.
Ed: Ah! Well, give grown-ups a little power and there's no telling where it can lead...
JD: I suppose so, but, hey, what are you gonna do?
JD: Not everyone had to run the whole mile. They give the little kids a break because, well, I guess because they're still little. Life is easier when you're little. But, being a teenager myself, I had to run the whole mile.
Ed: So, how did it go?
JD: It was sorta long, because we had to do it three and a half times around the pond...and it was really COLD and windy...that was one of the disadvantages...
My sister Cecily, poor kid, also had to run the whole mile because she is 10...and her legs ARE getting kind of long. But still, it was brutal.
Ed: So, how many laps did you older kids have to run?
JD: A dreadful three and a half miles!!!
Ed: But, unconfirmed reports mentioned that there were some faithful, hardy moms shivering under blankets to cheer you all on!
JD: Whatever. That didn't really help because they just kept standing still. We were the ones doing the pain!
Ed: Hmmmm....well, OK. Were you running against the wind, or did you have the wind at your back?
JD: Well, since it was kind of round, on one side the wind was behind us pushing us, but like all good things, it didn't last, because we would turn the corner and have the wind blast us in the face. It was hard to keep your balance.
Ed: Gracious! How did you manage?!
JD: Well, I did it...you just do it, ya know?
Ed: Did everyone finish well?
JD: Well, that's kind of in the perspective of the other people. Everyone was kind of lying in the grass and dying and stuff. There were a couple of kids who couldn't finish...or they didn't persist enough. Really, we were running against ourselves, not against each other. Well, I gotta go brush my teeth, so I'll see ya around.
Ed: But, Mr. Daniel, I don't think we're quite done here....Mr. Daniel...???